I was reading a book recently on the art of conversation and found a whole section on body language. How the position of your body influences your openness to a conversation.
For example, if someone has their hand up to their mouth or by their brow, they look like they are intent upon their thoughts. The last thing you’d want to do is interrupt their thinking, right? They don’t look approachable.
Crossed arms and legs or turning the body away from you, or the dreaded eyes wandering around the room not looking at you, are signs that the person isn’t just unwelcome towards your conversation, they want out and away from you.
Blogging isn’t about body language. It’s about language. Have you thought about what you do to stop the blog conversation on your blog before it even begins? If you aren’t using body language, what signs do you use? What are the clues?
Stopping Comments Before They Get Started
Here are a few ideas I have on how comments are stopped before they can get started on your blog.
- You’ve Said It All: When you’ve said everything there is to say on your blog post, you leave no room open for anyone else to add anything. You’ve shut down the conversation.
- It’s Not Open for Discussion: Strong use of language that indicates there is no room for argument nor discussion closes things down right away. If you have ever been in an argument with a friend or family member, and it gets to the point where there is nothing more to be said because there is no movement in the conversation, even if the debate continues, it’s no longer open for discussion. There’s nothing more that can be said. And continuing the conversation is a waste of time.
- You Begged For Comments: Conversation is natural. I start with an idea or opinion and you reply naturally. It flows forward. If I start with an idea or opinion and after every sentence say, “What do you think?” – it’s tiresome, isn’t it? The stronger you insist upon comments, the more needy you appear, and the less comfortable people are with responding, especially to a stranger.
- Not Everyone Will Always Respond: Not everyone who reads blogs deigns to replay. It’s about the reading, not the participation. You can’t win everyone over to the conversation. There will always be listeners. If you have more listeners than talkers, it could be that your blog subject attracts more listeners than talkers.
- You Haven’t Said Anything Worth Responding To: If you haven’t said anything worth commenting on, don’t expect comments. Not every blog post requires comments. Nor should you expect comments on every post. If there’s nothing to say, people won’t say anything.
- You Didn’t Use Your Own Words: Unless you set a precedence on your blog to inspire conversation based upon the words of others, if your post contains 80% the words of someone else, and 10% you, the odds are unlikely you will inspire comments to your 10%. More likely, they’ll go to the blogger you quoted and comment there. As they should. Change the odds and people will add to the conversation on your blog.
- It’s Been Said Before: The tendency is to repeat what is hot in the blogosphere, but there comes a point when it’s been said. We’re tired of it. Thus, if you say it again, the readers tired of the subject won’t comment. They are commented out on the subject.
So what do you think?
The author of Lorelle on WordPress and the fast-selling book, Blogging Tips: What Bloggers Won't Tell You About Blogging, as well as several other blogs, Lorelle VanFossen has been blogging for over 15 years, covering blogging, WordPress, travel, nature and travel photography, web design, web theory and development extensively as web technologies developed.